reaction to life

i have tried the city and i've found i don't like it. i don't like eating 3 meals a day in a cubicle. and i don't like eating dinner at 8:00 alone in my car cuz my husband is still working as i speed around the beltway at 70 mph in a hurry to get home to get to sleep so i can go to my second job at 2 a.m. i don't like how people don't wave at you as they pass you on the road because there are just way too many cars / people to wave at and they wouldn't know this courtesy anyways because of how they were raised. i don't like how people can sit in cubicles all day 3-5 ft apart and not speak to their neighbors. i don't like how i can work with the same people for 6 months and not know their wives' names or anything else about them and their home life. i don't like how they've never asked me anything about my husband either. some people move here to get to know all the wonderful people and i've found that all these "wonderful" people don't even care to know anyone. i don't like hearing pumps and buzzing power lines, beeping construction equipment, and roaring traffic 24 hours a day. i don't like how the night sky always glows orange. i don't like how everyone races to work each day like they are in the indy 500.

............i think i'm going insane. i have to be up for another big day in about 5 hours. and i don't want to go to bed. i want to stare at the pretty grass or the sky. i want to enjoy this small glimpse of the beautiful day God created. ....what AM i doing on this computer anyways?

i want to go sit on a hill and stare into space for about 2 weeks. i've been saying this for about 6 months now. i thought i might get my chance at campbellsburg but we were in the woods and that was just 2 days. there wasn't a lot of space to stare into from the hills. am i crazy???? my coworker said i was when i told her this desire. ha.

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